The game is simple, how drunk would you have to be to fuck this broad? The 1-10 rating system people use now doesn’t tell you shit. All that matters is whether you would fuck the chick or not. I would fuck any almost any girl, the real question is whether I would do it sober.
The rules are easy: I’ll show you a couple pictures of a questionable female, and you vote how drunk you would have to be on a scale of 1-10. One being stone cold sober, and 10 being completely blacked out.
First up – Rebel Wilson
Being fat is the best way to make my penis soft. I think seeing Rebel naked would have the same effect on my penis as watching gay porn. So I’m gonna have to get good and liquored up if I’m going to be able to get through with this. She probably has a good personality, but that does me no good here. This is a straight business deal, fuck and then get out.
Her only redeeming quality is that she probably gives a great gummer (blowjob). In a perfect world she would just keep her clothes on, blow me, and then leave my presence. Unfortunately, I have to actually have sex with her. And I don’t even know how to do that with someone that big. I don’t have much pride, so I’ve gone dumpster diving before; but I’ve never banged a chick THAT fat. If I have to do this, I would wanna pull the “keep your clothes on and cut a hole where your vagina is” move.
Ok down to the bottom line. I think I’d have to go with a 7 on the drunk scale. There’s no way that I could get up the courage (and erection) sober. And she’s not a ten because if she gets me going with an awesome gummer, the rest will be downhill.
P.S. – I’m trying to make the word gummer catch on because it is the greatest name for a blowjob. I didn’t copyright it, so feel free to pass it along.
Bay Area Stoolie 